Archive for Bill Bailey

Midfielding

Posted in Comedy Genius, Journal with tags , , on 27/02/2011 by Jen Healey

On Friday morning I went to the dentist, my new dentist, with whom I am really pleased.  He is quick, professional and talks to me like I’m not an idiot, which is more than I could say for the shop assistant who served me on Friday afternoon in the village shop.  After struggling up to my GP surgery to collect a prescription, holding an umbrella and some bags whilst pushing a pushchair (a Quinny with nowhere to hang the bags onto) and making sure my five year old stays away from the road, only to discover that it was closed, I went into the local shop damp and a bit vexed.  Having a little moan to the lady, who knows me pretty well, did nothing but make me want to swear.  She said “Did you think you could just go up there and be seen?” – er no!  Ok walking about the village in the rain may not be the smartest thing to do, but I had many eBay and Amazon parcels to post, which I’d posted prior to my pointless trip to the doctors’, hence the bags.  However, I didn’t think that I came across as a self-important village idiot! 

At any other time I’d have dealt with that kind of exchange with humour, but not so when tired, damp and with a (then full) grocery bag to lug back home in the increasing rain.  Thankfully my daughter is a good girl, especially with the promise of a pack of Smarties, so the return journey was nothing but a tiring trudge interspersed with me kicking myself for not checking the opening times that are on the side of my fridge.  I guess I am a bit of an idiot.  But I am still owed a lot of sleep to be fair.  Interestingly, at a study day once, I learned that lack of sleep can have the same kind of effect on your performance as being drunk.  So technically I’m managing to (mostly) function absolutely sozzled! 

On returning home I cheered myself up with some clips of Noel Fielding and Bill Bailey, here’s a bit of each for you… 

Midfielding featuring Noel was introduced to me by my very good friend Michelle, who included it on a mix CD she made for me, it always makes me smile. 

And this Bill Bailey clip features a freak-out that I would’ve dearly loved to have had the guts to do at my previous dentist, he deserved it for charging me £600 for bridges that fell out twice!  Cue my new dentist to fix the damage done by them and to make me feel like a real old maid by fitting me for a partial denture!  At thirty! 😦

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No stars

Posted in Astronomy, Comedy Genius, Journal with tags , , , on 23/02/2011 by Jen Healey

Well I’m up before the sun again, but I’m actually not bothered.  My little boy impressed me again last night with sleeping in his own room, after 10pm he didn’t make a peep until 5am, so I’m starting off the day pretty pleased.  Although, the sky is being less than cooperative, as it is cloudy which prevents me from seeing any stars.  If it wasn’t being awkward, this is what is on offer from the universe to view this month…

http://hubblesite.org/explore_astronomy/tonights_sky/

I love astronomy and I plan, one day, to do a course in it so that I’ll actually be able to know what I’m looking at, beyond a few of the major constellations.  It fascinates and humbles me to gaze into the night sky, when it is clear.  It has a similar effect to that of watching the sea, for me at least, in that it can make all the everyday hassles, worries and inconveniences seem insignificant and trivial.  It really is a wonderful, beautiful and peaceful way to quiet a stressed mind.  When you consider the sheer vastness of it all, everyday niggles become just that, niggles that can (sometimes) become instantly manageable, because in the grand scheme of things it is a minute, tiny, fleeting moment in the cosmos. 

There are an infinite number of things that are much greater, more powerful and important than, for example; being late for work, someone being rude to you, what dress size you are or how much sleep your children let you have.  In comparison with the billions of years that the universe has existed, life truly is too short to sweat this very small stuff. Especially when you consider that each one of the stars pictured below is a gigantic nuclear sun, similar to our own, with its own set of planets with their own satellites.  Also, this is a very small portion of the night sky, which is full of billions and billions other celestial wonders… 

Star Cluster NGC 290

It really is Pringle sandwich time! 

Crush crush crush, yum yum yum yum yum…

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